{"id":109,"date":"2021-10-02T15:13:02","date_gmt":"2021-10-02T15:13:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/?p=109"},"modified":"2021-10-02T15:14:33","modified_gmt":"2021-10-02T15:14:33","slug":"das-nein-im-vielleicht-horen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/de\/das-nein-im-vielleicht-horen\/","title":{"rendered":"Das \"Nein\" im \"Vielleicht\" h\u00f6ren"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Wenn wir in jemanden verliebt sind, konzentrieren wir uns auf das \"Ja\" im \"Vielleicht\". <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Heute ist es f\u00fcr mich an der Zeit, auch das \"Nein\" zu h\u00f6ren. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Mein Liebesinteresse und ich haben einen Zyklus, der folgenderma\u00dfen abl\u00e4uft:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>sie entschuldigt sich f\u00fcr die lange Wartezeit, in der ich nichts von ihr geh\u00f6rt habe (w\u00e4hrend der ich ihr Freiraum gegeben habe)<\/li><li>wir fangen wieder an, miteinander zu kommunizieren - ich schicke ihr manchmal ein paar Bilder, wir unterhalten uns \u00fcber verschiedene Dinge, ich versuche, es meist locker zu halten<\/li><li>vielleicht frage ich sie am Telefon, ob wir uns treffen k\u00f6nnen (sie lebt in den USA, ich in Deutschland, wir sehen uns also normalerweise nicht)<\/li><li>Sie k\u00f6nnte sogar sagen: \"Sicher, schlagen Sie eine Zeit vor\".<\/li><li>Ich schlage eine Zeit vor<\/li><li>Ich h\u00f6re nichts von ihr - vielleicht liest sie die letzte Nachricht, vielleicht auch nicht (sie l\u00e4sst sie ungelesen)<\/li><li>Ich gebe ihr Raum<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Heute war ich wieder einmal niedergeschlagen, und ich besuchte das Grab meiner Gro\u00dfeltern. Es geht nichts \u00fcber einen Friedhof, der einen daran erinnert, dass alle Fragen und Probleme relativ sind und dass das Leben sehr kurz ist ... <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Auf dem Weg dorthin ist mir eine Idee gekommen, die ich heute hier vorstellen m\u00f6chte:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Sie kann die Liebe nicht so empfinden, wie ich sie ihr vorstelle, weil sie es nie gelernt hat.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Wenn sie sich zur\u00fcckzieht, ist es wirklich <strong>weil sie <span style=\"text-decoration: underline\" class=\"underline\">nimmt  wahr. <\/span>meine Handlungen als negativ \/ bedrohlich <\/strong>\/ sieht mehr Schattenseiten in meinem Verhalten. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Es gibt nichts, was ich tun kann (jedenfalls nichts, was sie mir mitgeteilt hat), um das zu \u00e4ndern: <strong>Es ist eine Frage der Wahrnehmung auf ihrer Seite<\/strong>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Durch ihr Verhalten zeigt sie mir, dass sie nicht \"mehr davon\" braucht. Nein - sie zieht sich zur\u00fcck, sie mauert mich ab. <strong>Sie zeigt mir, dass das nicht gut f\u00fcr sie ist.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Und das ist das \"Nein\", von dem ich spreche. Es wird nicht in Worten ausgedr\u00fcckt (obwohl sie ein Geburtstagsgeschenk von mir abgelehnt hatte) - es wird in Taten ausgedr\u00fcckt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Auch wenn sie sich nicht ganz sicher ist und mir gemischte Botschaften schickt (Smileys mit Herzen usw.), ist dies ein klares Nein von ihrer Seite. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ein Nein vielleicht aufgrund ihrer traumatischen Vergangenheit, aber ein <strong>keine <\/strong>auf die ich h\u00f6ren muss und die ich respektieren muss. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Denn nichts wird sich \u00e4ndern, und ich und meine Liebe passen nicht in das Schloss, das \"ihr Herz \u00f6ffnen\" wird. Traurig, aber wahr. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Wenn Sie sich in einer \u00e4hnlichen Situation befinden, schlage ich vor, dass Sie pr\u00fcfen, ob es sich um ein Muster handelt - oder um eine einmalige Sache. Wenn es sich um ein zyklisches Muster des R\u00fcckzugs handelt, dann hat Ihr Liebesinteresse vielleicht auch ein \"Nein\" in sich, und er muss an sich arbeiten, bevor es zu einem starken Ja wird. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ich habe jetzt vor, dieses Thema mit ihr anzusprechen, wenn sie unseren Zyklus wieder aufnimmt, um mir selbst gegen\u00fcber fair zu sein und um keine Bedrohung mehr f\u00fcr sie zu sein.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ich werde ihr nur so lange Freundschaft anbieten, bis es ein klares \"Ja\" von ihrer Seite gibt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ich habe vor, wieder mit anderen Frauen auszugehen, sobald ich ihr dieses Angebot gemacht habe. <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When we are in love with someone, we focus on the &#8220;yes&#8221; in the &#8220;maybe&#8221;. Today, for me, it is time to hear the &#8220;no&#8221;, as well. My love interest and me, we have a cycle which runs as follows: she apologizes for the long delay in which I didn&#8217;t hear from her (during which [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"default","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[69,5,9,68],"class_list":["post-109","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-emotionally-unavailable-women","tag-chasing-emotionally-unavailable-women","tag-dismissive-avoidant","tag-distancer-pursuer-dynamic","tag-withdrawal"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Hearing the &quot;no&quot; in the &quot;maybe&quot; - VitalMeaning<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/de\/das-nein-im-vielleicht-horen\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"de_DE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Hearing the &quot;no&quot; in the &quot;maybe&quot; - VitalMeaning\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"When we are in love with someone, we focus on the &#8220;yes&#8221; in the &#8220;maybe&#8221;. 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