{"id":134,"date":"2021-11-13T08:49:25","date_gmt":"2021-11-13T08:49:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/?p=134"},"modified":"2021-11-13T08:52:06","modified_gmt":"2021-11-13T08:52:06","slug":"unsichere-bindungsstile-und-kontrolle","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/de\/unsichere-bindungsstile-und-kontrolle\/","title":{"rendered":"Unsichere Bindungsstile und Kontrolle"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Ich hatte wieder eine dieser Einsichten. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Wir alle wollen bestimmte Ziele erreichen und im Wesentlichen unsere Gef\u00fchle kontrollieren. Manche Menschen wenden dazu direkte Methoden an - zum Beispiel, indem sie Grenzen setzen und sich von Menschen distanzieren, die diese Grenzen nicht respektieren. (Damit setzen sie im Wesentlichen eine h\u00e4rtere Grenze). Und indem sie sich mit Menschen umgeben, die sicher sind und best\u00e4ndige Liebe geben (weil sie von Natur aus dazu in der Lage sind). <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Andere Menschen haben in ihrer Kindheit gelernt, dass es nicht sicher ist, Grenzen zu setzen. Dass Grenzen ignoriert werden. Oder m\u00f6glicherweise, dass andere Menschen, wenn sie zu nahe kommen <strong>wird<\/strong> \u00fcberw\u00e4ltigen sie. Also ziehen sie sich zur\u00fcck (abweisende Vermeider) - und <strong>Kontrolle <\/strong>die N\u00e4he und ihre \u00c4ngste, die diese N\u00e4he verursacht, durch R\u00fcckzug. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Andere haben gelernt, dass sie extrem aggressiv und manipulativ vorgehen m\u00fcssen, um sich die Aufmerksamkeit des anderen zu sichern. Meine (bisher einzige) Ex-Freundin hat zum Beispiel versucht, mich eifers\u00fcchtig zu machen. Es hat nicht so funktioniert, wie sie es wollte ... (\u00e4ngstliche Bindung). Sie versuchen auch <strong>Kontrolle <\/strong>die N\u00e4he. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Im Grunde genommen geht es bei all dem um Kontrolle.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Und <span style=\"text-decoration: underline\" class=\"underline\">nicht<\/span> Kontrolle \u00fcber die andere Person, wie Sie vielleicht naiv annehmen. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Hier geht es um Kontrolle <strong>unserer eigenen emotionalen Zust\u00e4nde. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Wenn man dies erkennt, f\u00e4llt es einem leichter, loszulassen. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Situationen loslassen, die uns nicht mehr dienlich sind (wie es die Thais ausdr\u00fccken w\u00fcrden). <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Na los! <a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=oonHquCgFl4\">in etwas Bequemeres schl\u00fcpfen<\/a>. Lassen Sie das los, was Sie sowieso nicht kontrollieren k\u00f6nnen - eine andere Person. Entscheiden Sie sich, die Situation so zu sehen, wie sie ist. Lassen Sie Ihre \u00c4ngste ruhen. Sie haben sich ge\u00e4u\u00dfert, jetzt m\u00fcssen wir nach vorne schauen. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Aufgeben. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Und vergessen Sie nicht die Grenzen - die <strong>echte Kontrolle <\/strong>Sie haben. <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;ve had another one of these insights. We all want to achieve certain goals, and essentially control our emotions. Some people use direct methods to do this &#8211; for example by setting boundaries, and dissociating from people who disrespect the boundaries. (Thereby essentially setting a harder boundary). And associating with people who are safe &amp; [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"default","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[17,11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-134","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-boundaries","category-relationships"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Insecure attachment styles and control - VitalMeaning<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/de\/unsichere-bindungsstile-und-kontrolle\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"de_DE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Insecure attachment styles and control - VitalMeaning\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I&#8217;ve had another one of these insights. 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