{"id":94,"date":"2021-09-16T07:47:34","date_gmt":"2021-09-16T07:47:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/?p=94"},"modified":"2021-09-16T17:33:11","modified_gmt":"2021-09-16T17:33:11","slug":"traitement-de-lombre-en-temps-reel-technique-de-defense-protection-contre-les-critiques-injustes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/traitement-de-lombre-en-temps-reel-technique-de-defense-protection-contre-les-critiques-injustes\/","title":{"rendered":"Technique de d\u00e9fense par traitement de l'ombre en temps r\u00e9el (protection contre les critiques injustes)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Au cours d'une des explosions \u00e9motionnelles de mon p\u00e8re avec des critiques \u00e0 mon \u00e9gard, j'ai d\u00e9couvert une technique tr\u00e8s efficace pour prot\u00e9ger ses propres \u00e9motions (et sa vuln\u00e9rabilit\u00e9) contre les critiques injustes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

L'id\u00e9e est d'appliquer un traitement des ombres en temps r\u00e9el \u00e0 partir de l'ordinateur de l'entreprise. autre <\/em>le point de vue de la personne.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

S'ils sont d\u00e9clench\u00e9s par quelque chose, cela renvoie \u00e0 quelque chose en eux.<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Par exemple, si on m'accuse d'\u00eatre insensible, \u00e9go\u00efste, etc. - c'est mon p\u00e8re qui le dit : \"Je projette mon \u00e9go\u00efsme sur toi, je projette mon insensibilit\u00e9 sur toi, et \u00e7a me d\u00e9clenche\". <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

J'ai r\u00e9ussi \u00e0 rester assez calme pendant cette session, et \u00e0 ne pas me laisser emporter par l'\u00e9motion. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

J'ai compris que derri\u00e8re son emportement, il y a de la douleur et des besoins non satisfaits qu'il n'arrive pas \u00e0 communiquer d'une autre mani\u00e8re. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bien qu'il ait pr\u00e9tendu que cela ne le d\u00e9rangeait pas que je m'\u00e9loigne de la discussion (ce que j'avais voulu faire, car j'\u00e9tais fatigu\u00e9e et je ne voulais pas m'impliquer dans des discussions sur un proc\u00e8s que ma famille avait perdu), j'ai r\u00e9alis\u00e9 que la \"bonne\" chose \u00e0 faire (pour r\u00e9duire les dommages et les tensions dans la relation) \u00e9tait de rester.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Je suis donc rest\u00e9, et j'ai r\u00e9ussi \u00e0 engager une discussion civile \u00e0 un moment donn\u00e9 et \u00e0 faire baisser la tension.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Les interactions avec mon p\u00e8re m'ont amen\u00e9 \u00e0 m'int\u00e9resser \u00e0 la psychologie et \u00e0 me documenter sur les relations humaines. Pour assurer ma s\u00e9curit\u00e9, mais je vois que ces comp\u00e9tences sont vraiment tr\u00e8s utiles dans tous les autres domaines de ma vie \u00e9galement (par exemple, les affaires). <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Voici \u00e9galement une transaction que j'ai eue avec une personne qui a r\u00e9pondu \u00e0 une annonce que nous avions publi\u00e9e, \u00e0 la recherche d'un nouvel employ\u00e9 pour emballer les commandes :<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

(lui) \"Le salaire est ridicule\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(moi) \"Merci pour vos commentaires et bonne chance dans votre recherche d'emploi\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(lui) \"Je suis un ma\u00eetre peintre salari\u00e9, je gagne 4000 \u20ac brut par mois\".<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Le salaire en question (que je suis pr\u00eat \u00e0 payer) \u00e9tait de 1800 \u20ac brut par mois. Au d\u00e9part, j'avais suppos\u00e9 qu'il cherchait un emploi, qu'il voulait \u00eatre employ\u00e9 par nous, mais qu'il avait besoin d'un salaire plus \u00e9lev\u00e9 (politique de la rancune). Maintenant, j'ai pens\u00e9 qu'il voulait peut-\u00eatre la justice sociale, des salaires \u00e9lev\u00e9s pour tous, etc. - J'ai r\u00e9pondu que je suis heureux qu'il ait ce salaire, et je lui ai demand\u00e9 ce qui l'avait pouss\u00e9 \u00e0 \u00e9crire le message initial. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Il y a peut-\u00eatre une raison int\u00e9ressante derri\u00e8re cela. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Peut-\u00eatre que c'est une projection de son sentiment d'indignit\u00e9 par rapport au salaire qu'il re\u00e7oit actuellement. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ne pas prendre les choses comme des attaques personnelles (m\u00eame si elles sont cens\u00e9es l'\u00eatre, car c'est la fa\u00e7on dont les choses se passent). uniquement <\/strong>l'outil de l'autre personne) nous permet de d\u00e9samorcer la situation et d'en savoir plus. Peut-\u00eatre plus pour se d\u00e9sengager, peut-\u00eatre des informations int\u00e9ressantes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

De plus, c'est \u00e9galement amusant car ces attaques personnelles sont destin\u00e9es \u00e0 d\u00e9s\u00e9quilibrer votre humeur, voire \u00e0 susciter une r\u00e9action \u00e9motionnelle de votre part. C'est POURQUOI l'autre personne utilise cet outil - elle a appris que c'est quelque chose qui fonctionne. (Pauvres b\u00e2tards) <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Si vous r\u00e9pondez tr\u00e8s diff\u00e9remment, et \u00eates capable de d\u00e9tourner ces attaques personnelles en les faisant passer pour des propos que l'autre personne tient en r\u00e9alit\u00e9 \u00e0 son sujet.<\/strong>vous serez en mesure de comprendre le message qu'il vous adresse \u00e0 propos de la douleur qu'il ressent, et de r\u00e9agir de mani\u00e8re constructive \u00e0 quelque chose qui est utilis\u00e9 de mani\u00e8re destructive par cette autre personne. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Vous serez plus heureux<\/strong>et plus d\u00e9tendu, et c'est ce qui compte. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

C'est leur douleur, pas la v\u00f4tre - mais vous pouvez comprendre de quelle mani\u00e8re la situation dans laquelle vous vous trouvez les a d\u00e9clench\u00e9s. Tout le monde n'a pas de bonnes comp\u00e9tences intrapersonnelles. Tout le monde n'a pas r\u00e9ussi \u00e0 se trouver dans un environnement o\u00f9 il pouvait les acqu\u00e9rir. Ces choses s'apprennent - et les critiques contre-productives \/ attaques personnelles s'apprennent aussi. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

P.S. cette personne a r\u00e9pondu \u00e0 ma question sur ce qui l'a motiv\u00e9 \u00e0 m'\u00e9crire de mani\u00e8re quelque peu cryptique \"jeder wie er es verdient\" ( \u00e0 chacun ce qu'il m\u00e9rite \/ gagne). <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

During one of my father’s emotional outbursts with criticism towards me I discovered a very effective technique to protect one’s own emotions (and vulnerability) against unjust criticism. The idea is to apply real-time shadow processing from the other person’s perspective. If they are triggered by something, it is referring to something within them. e.g. if […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"default","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[31],"tags":[53,49,48,54,55,21,50,52,51],"class_list":["post-94","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-tools-for-emotional-work","tag-angry-people","tag-attacks","tag-criticism","tag-emotional-outbursts","tag-hate","tag-pain","tag-personal-attack","tag-shift-mood","tag-take-personal"],"yoast_head":"\nReal-time shadow processing defense technique (protection against unjust criticism) - VitalMeaning<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/traitement-de-lombre-en-temps-reel-technique-de-defense-protection-contre-les-critiques-injustes\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Real-time shadow processing defense technique (protection against unjust criticism) - VitalMeaning\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"During one of my father’s emotional outbursts with criticism towards me I discovered a very effective technique to protect one’s own emotions (and vulnerability) against unjust criticism. 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Je m'int\u00e9resse actuellement au Raspberry Pi, \u00e0 l'intelligence artificielle et au d\u00e9veloppement personnel. Je suis un grand fan de Thais Gibson, de sa cha\u00eene YouTube et de son \u00e9cole :-)","sameAs":["https:\/\/pi3g.com"],"url":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/author\/max\/"}]}},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":false,"thumbnail":false,"medium":false,"medium_large":false,"large":false,"1536x1536":false,"2048x2048":false,"trp-custom-language-flag":false},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"Max","author_link":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/author\/max\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"During one of my father’s emotional outbursts with criticism towards me I discovered a very effective technique to protect one’s own emotions (and vulnerability) against unjust criticism. The idea is to apply real-time shadow processing from the other person’s perspective. If they are triggered by something, it is referring to something within them. e.g. if\u2026","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/94","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=94"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/94\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":101,"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/94\/revisions\/101"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=94"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=94"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/fr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=94"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}