{"id":107,"date":"2021-09-25T16:21:04","date_gmt":"2021-09-25T16:21:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/?p=107"},"modified":"2021-09-25T16:21:04","modified_gmt":"2021-09-25T16:21:04","slug":"ar-det-rimligt-att-forsoka-kontrollera-detta","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/sv\/ar-det-rimligt-att-forsoka-kontrollera-detta\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00c4r det rimligt att f\u00f6rs\u00f6ka kontrollera detta?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Jag arbetar f\u00f6r n\u00e4rvarande med kursen \"Perfectionism\" av Thais Gibson<\/a>. Hon rekommenderar att vi fr\u00e5gar oss om det vi f\u00f6rs\u00f6ker kontrollera verkligen ligger inom v\u00e5r rimliga kontroll. Och om inte, att sluta f\u00f6rs\u00f6ka kontrollera det - och ge sig h\u00e4n \u00e5t resultatet. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Som drivna, perfektionistiska m\u00e4nniskor kan vi k\u00e4nna att \"ingenting \u00e4r om\u00f6jligt\" och f\u00f6rs\u00f6ka l\u00f6sa relationer med andra m\u00e4nniskor. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Att g\u00e5ng p\u00e5 g\u00e5ng misslyckas och s\u00f6ka efter nya s\u00e4tt att \"f\u00e5 det att fungera\". <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Till exempel drar sig kvinnan jag k\u00e4nner f\u00f6r tillbaka - och jag undrar om det \u00e4r jag som g\u00f6r n\u00e5got fel, vad jag ska \u00e4ndra och hur jag ska \"f\u00e5 information fr\u00e5n henne om vad jag beh\u00f6ver justera\".<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Om vi f\u00f6r ett \u00f6gonblick bortser fr\u00e5n att problemet kanske inte alls ligger p\u00e5 min sida (jag uppf\u00f6r mig p\u00e5 ett mycket rimligt s\u00e4tt, \u00e4r t\u00e5lmodig, v\u00e4nlig etc.). <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Min tanke \u00e4r \u00e4nd\u00e5: \"Om jag bara visste vad det \u00e4r, skulle jag kunna f\u00f6r\u00e4ndra och f\u00f6rb\u00e4ttra saker och ting\".<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men \u00e4r det n\u00e5got jag kan kontrollera?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c4r det n\u00e5got jag kan kontrollera att jag faktiskt vet vad det \u00e4r? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Om hon inte vill dela med sig till mig av egen vilja och arbeta f\u00f6r att bygga upp en relation, \u00e4r det n\u00e5got jag kan kontrollera? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nej, detta ligger utanf\u00f6r min rimliga kontroll. Hon vet att jag \u00e4r intresserad. Jag har allts\u00e5 gjort min del.<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jag har ocks\u00e5 fr\u00e5gat om det \u00e4r r\u00e4tt att ge henne utrymme n\u00e4r hon drar sig undan (hon svarade inte). <\/p>\n\n\n\n

S\u00e5 det enda som \u00e5terst\u00e5r f\u00f6r mig \u00e4r att ge upp. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Att ge upp och b\u00f6rja tillgodose mina behov p\u00e5 ett annat s\u00e4tt \u00e4n genom ett fantasifullt f\u00f6rh\u00e5llande. <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I am currently working on the “Perfectionism” course by Thais Gibson. She recommends to inquire, whether the particular thing we are trying to control is actually within our reasonable control. And if not, to stop trying to control it – and surrender to the outcome. As driven, perfectionistic people, we might feel that “nothing is […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"default","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,11,31],"tags":[64,66,5,65,67,62,63],"class_list":["post-107","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-emotionally-unavailable-women","category-relationships","category-tools-for-emotional-work","tag-chasing","tag-control","tag-dismissive-avoidant","tag-distancer-pursuer-dynamic-2","tag-give-up-control","tag-surrender","tag-withdrawing"],"yoast_head":"\nIs it reasonable to try and control this? - VitalMeaning<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/vitalmeaning.com\/sv\/ar-det-rimligt-att-forsoka-kontrollera-detta\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"sv_SE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Is it reasonable to try and control this? - VitalMeaning\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I am currently working on the “Perfectionism” course by Thais Gibson. 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