Pull on the right lever

Picking up the topic of “Can I actually control this?” up again.

Everything we do is connected to some need we have. Or actually, it’s better to think of this as a chain of needs / linked concepts interlocking which serve to fill a core need.

“If I get this woman, I will be able to experience a sense of adventure, which serves my need for novelty and uncertainty.”

But what if the lever is disconnected? What if pulling harder and harder on it doesn’t yield any result? There’s no movement? Leaving you with a feeling of desperation, and being out of control?

Then you have to pull on a DIFFERENT lever. The need still HAS to be met. But you are in control again – because you are actually using a lever which connects to the chain of needs. It may work in a different way than expected, but it WILL work.

An example from my life: training people for a particular job is not always possible (they might be incapable). But it is possible to hire the right people, which you CAN train.

The fork and the screwdriver

Have you ever tried to use a fork to screw in a screw? No?

The screwdriver is the right tool for that. All our concepts are actually tools, tools to get certain needs met – however abstract they may be.

The concept of love is also such a tool – to meet our needs for companionship, protection, intellectual stimulation, safety.

Let’s stop using forks for the screws and get ourselves screwdrivers.